she was so not down for the gang bang
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
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