come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
