Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Randomize
