ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
