Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
