I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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