I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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