We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
he shaved USA in his pubs
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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