Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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