her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
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