doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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