if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
