is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
