At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
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