So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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