Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
