drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
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