Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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