dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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