how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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