i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
