She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
