I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
