Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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