what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I can't put those talents on a resume
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Randomize
