Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Randomize