And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
no more duck duck goose at the bar
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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