whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
We have started to decorate penises.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
