all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I can't turn off my feet"
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize
