is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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