i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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