omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
