So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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