I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
