I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
