Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
