Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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