and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
