It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize