Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
