you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Randomize
