I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
