The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
