I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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