was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
