At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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