I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
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