Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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