do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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