is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
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